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My Son Can Dance

One Mom's Musings About Boys in the Dance World

Dance Stores and Studios that Don’t Meet Dancin’ Boys Needs

September 28, 2010 by Nina 2 Comments

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OMG! When you really need a dance belt, you can never find one. A dance store should not call itself a dance store if it not going to carry dance belts in all sizes and in all styles. I mean really…to show up at a store in dire need of a dance belt fast and to find they have only small sizes in full bottom…that’s not a dance store.

I told a store clerk that today in no uncertain terms. You can be sure we won’t return there ever again.

I know I’m preaching to the choir here. Dance stores do not carry items for boys. That’s just a fact. But really. Give me a break.

Okay…I’ve ranted. As you may have guessed, we had a minor (well…not so minor) issue with a forgotten dance belt.

On to other things. I apologize for my neglect of this blog. Life has just been crazy and driving the hour and 15 or 25 minutes to San Francisco every day has not helped. Yes…that’s how long we are in the car (one way) to get Julian to City Ballet School. It’s well worth the drive, though. He is loving the classes and the (basically) private lessons with Yuri Zhukov. He says he has improved immensely in just a few short weeks. He’s also very excited to be partnering some of the best dancers there for the school’s Nutcracker as he takes on the role of Cavalier and Snow Prince.

I think the decision to move into a full ballet program at this point was a good one. However, I must say that I’m happy that he has contemporary classes twice a week, so he won’t lose that totally. I miss him doing tap and hip hop occasionally. And I’m very sorry he isn’t doing modern.

I’m going to put something out there for those readers who are dance teachers or administrators of dance programs: I suggest you really pay attention to the needs of your male dancers. When they come to you and say, I want more ballet technique or more opportunity to work on the “guy ballet stuff, ” or my interest lies in break dancing or in modern or in classical partnering, LISTEN. Don’t stop there, though. DO SOMETHING. Studios lose their boys when they don’t cater to their needs.

I can hear the rumblings: “Why should we cater to their needs? We shouldn’t have to treat them like they are special.” Listen up…again! The boys are special. And there aren’t that many of them. If you don’t want to lose the one or two really good male dancers you have, cater to them. Give them what they want. Otherwise, they will go elsewhere to get it…which is what Julian did this year.

Next post…I promise…the first in a series with choreographer and dancer Joey Dowling.

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Filed Under: dance attire, dance studios, Keeping Boys in Studios, Nutcracker, Teachers Tagged With: dance belts, dealing with young male dancers, keeping male dancers in class, Retaining male dancers

Comments

  1. Lisa says

    September 29, 2010 at 5:08 am

    Amen – my 12 year old son has had the exact same issues. Here in the Midwest, almost everything dancewear wise for boys has to be ordered or substitutions found. Nobody in town carries the dance briefs and only one store has dance belts – none in his skinny hiney size though! Buying shoes is a complete nightmare – I really dread it when he needs a bigger size. He’s currently in a size 12 mens – that’s as big as most brands go, never mind they are never in stock that big here. I buy him women’s running tights in a crop length for his ballet classes. He loves them but I don’t tell him they are womens. They are just plain black and can’t tell We haven’t tried the footed tights yet but those of course would have to be ordered.

    He changed studios this year as well. 7 years with his old rec studio, he had outgrown what the studio was willing to offer a boy. While boys only classes sound really good in theory, he was unfortunately faced with a lesser quality class than what was offered girls. The girls also resent your presence in classes, thinking you should stick to the boys classes only. While he was good friends with all of the boys, he also had little in common dance wise with the other boys because they were just there for the fun of it. He was the only one who took the classes seriously. Last year at the old studio, my son started taking the ballet classes they offered. I don’t think they have ever had boys take these classes and had to be talked into letting him join. Girls are required to take the ballet classes if they want to be on the dance team. Otherwise, wild horses couldn’t drag them in there. My son was the only one who wanted to be there and quickly outpaced both classes. The teacher took me aside on the sly and told me, for his sake, to get him out of this studio because he needed more. He’s in a pre-professional program now and is just thriving. I haven’t seen him this happy/excited about dance in a long time. While he was sad to leave his guy friends at the other studio, he has thanked me repeatedly for making him change studios.

  2. Amanda says

    November 8, 2010 at 12:29 pm

    Agreed! And also agree with the previous comment. My sons are too young for dance belts, but tights are a challenge – I get them girls black leggings, which works okay. The ones from Gap fit, but come with lace on the bottom that you have to cut off. The American Apparel ones are too baggy – apparently my boys have skinnier legs than most girls their height.
    What annoys me is that the dance store in our ballet school hasn’t got the required clothing for boys. There are other boys in the school, and the uniform is required. They have the uniforms for girls, all the different leotard colors for different levels, but they can’t be bothered to stock black tights and slim t-shirts. Grrr…

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