Archive for the ‘Stereotypes’ Category

Denise Wall On Raising Dancin' Boys (Part 2)

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

In this continuation of my interview with Denise Wall, which I conducted while Julian and I were in New York City last summer during the ABT Summer Intensive, she discusses issues of sibling rivalry, sexuality and peer pressure. Denise and I met at the New York City Dance Alliance finals, where students from her studio were attending classes and competing. Julian and I returned later that evening to see them perform, and we had a chance to meet all of Denise’s sons with the exception of Travis. Here, in part 2 of my interview, Denise offers some great advice for any young dancer, not just young male dancers. (To read the first part of this interview, click here.)

Is it hard to have more than one dancin’ boy in the family? I know of other families with boys who, for instance, both have competed at YAGP or the older one has become a professional ballet dancer. The younger one sometimes feels he isn’t considered as good as the older brother.

It can be hard when you have to follow behind someone else who dances. Danny got a full scholarship to the Kirov at 15. Travis was always compared to Danny; Travis had a hard time with that, but he just created his own thing for himself and said, “This is me.”

How did you support each of your boys through the issues of teasing, sibling rivalry and sexuality?

Basically, you have to tell them, “Every day when you get up you have to figure out what you believe in and who you are and stick with it. If you don’t love yourself, no one else is going to love you. People are going to compare, and when they do, you have to let them know, ‘I’m Danny,’ or ‘I’m Travis’ or ‘I’m Tyler. I’m not my brothers. I love them, but I’m an individual.’”

As a mother you have to remind your sons and tell them these things every day, especially when any of these issues come up.

How do you counsel your boys about sexuality issues, especially about the fear of being gay or actually being gay?

Years ago, the Houston Oilers were making football players take ballet. It was a big thing, and I thought, “Oh my God, finally they are letting out the truth about how good ballet is for athletes.” So, that’s one thing I would tell my boys—that athletes take ballet, too. [Former pro football player] Lynn Swann would take ballet, too. I would say, “Everyone looks up to this athlete. He’s amazing. He’s rough and tough, yet he’s taking ballet because that’s one of the things he does for football.”  I would use him as an example. I would say you, “You wouldn’t call him gay because he’s doing ballet for his sport.”  Things like that help.

The issue of sexuality and whether or not the boy’s are gay or become gay is not just a dance issue; it’s a personal issue. [The boys] just have to love themselves and believe in themselves, and it’s really hard when you have peer pressure.

I even tell the girls at the studio that seem so strong…they have the issue of boyfriends that manipulate their minds or friends or parents… when they get in the shower or before they go to school, they should ask themselves, “What do you believe in? Who are you? Are you a mean person? If so, you have to fix that. If you don’t like your feelings hurt, then you need to not hurt other people’s feelings. You need to not be selfish and take other people into consideration. You need to think about that every morning when you get up, because there are negative things out there waiting to take up your body and mind.”

Have you encountered boys who feel influenced by gay peers to become gay?

When you idolize somebody and put them on a pedestal, then you start questioning yourself…I have seen situations where guys did swing the other way because they were hanging out with other gay guys. They though they were, too, because people were telling them they were. Then at the end they figure it out and come back around.

Next post: Denise offers tips for raising boys who dance.

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Posted in Attitude, Denise Wall, sexuality, Stereotypes | 2 Comments »

Challenging Gender Stereotypes in Ballet

Thursday, January 28th, 2010

Catherine Tully

Recently I discovered a comment here on this blog from Catherine L. Tully. I felt tickled, because not only is Catherine a dance educator who has taught dance for over 22 years both in the United States and Japan, she currently serves as the Outside Representative for the National Dance Teachers Association in the UK as well.  Additionally, she is a writer and photographer with over over 36 years of experience and has written for Dance Teacher, Dance Spirit, Highland Dancer and youngARTS, among many other publications. Although I’m not a dance teacher, Catherine and I agree that we have a few things in common…such as the publications for which we write. We also both also have websites for writers and blogs about writing. (You can find out more about Catherine at www.4dancers.org.)

In any case, I asked Catherine if she’d like to write a guest blog post for me about the role of a male dancer. She gladly agreed. Here’s her post…

Challenging Gender Stereotypes in Ballet
By Catherine L. Tully

Much as I love Balanchine, I have come to a place in my life where I take issue with one of his more popular statements: “Ballet is Woman. In sports, it’s Mickey Mantle. In politics, it’s Eisenhower. In ballet, it’s woman. Women are lighter, more flexible. They move more beautifully. He is not the King, but she’s the Queen.”

Is that really true? I think not.

Now, let me back-pedal a bit. I do think that to Balanchine—and for his ballets, this was true. He found inspiration in women. But much as Mickey Mantle is no longer the representative for sports, and Eisenhower is not the first name that springs to mind when politics come up, men no longer take the back seat in ballet. And it’s about time that it is changing.

Although some choreographers still use men as a foil for women on stage, this is not true across the board. Men are being showcased more often in their own right. They are being allowed to explore different ways of moving and being on stage. When I was coming up in the ballet world, the man was your partner, and he got a chance to showcase his skills somewhere in the ballet, but other than that, his job was to make you look beautiful. It was such a narrow view of what men are capable of, and a disappointing one, really.

I have always hated gender roles in ballet. When I was dancing, I yearned to do some type of solo in technique shoes that wasn’t just “pretty.” I wanted to be able to show off the power and athleticism of ballet as a woman—to leap and to spin without being restricted by pointe shoes. I always wondered why women didn’t rebel against this narrow view of their talents. But now I realize that we, too, were stereotyped.

The very thing that elevated women to Balanchine’s coveted status also kept us from exploring our own possibilities. We were just as trapped as men under this system. We just didn’t realize it.

I have to again say that I love Balanchine. I do. His ballets are amazing and his choreography fascinates me. There is little doubt that there was pure genius operating there. Magic, really. Yet I love that there has been more exploration since then, more challenges to these long-held gender roles in dance. And I hope that it will continue.

My wish for both men and women in dance is that they have the freedom and the opportunity to explore both strength and softness. I hope the choreography will be dictated by the music and not some pre-conceived notion of what either sex is “supposed” to do. I see a future where we can take the stage as true partners, and bring out the best in one another—whatever that may be.

There will always be a place for Balanchine in my heart and in ballet, but rather than looking back, I choose instead to look forward. We are all capable of so much more.

Posted in Stereotypes | 6 Comments »