Comments on: When Losing Dance Becomes a Consequence for Missed Homework Assignments and Bad Grades (and a Note on the Sexuality Issue)

By: Darkhorse445

Darkhorse445 — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 09:08:08 +0000

Hey first time reading your blog.. being a male dancer, it slightly reminds me of my days being a bit younger and being lazy!
And like you said tough love.. it might do the trick.
I’m sure he’ll throw a bit of a fit on the day he’s meant to go to dance and your telling him he should be working on his studies. but always remember to tell him that if he starts improving he can gain the lessons back. That is what my father did to me.

The sexuality thing! that is always a nightmare!of course everyone will jump to conclusions when a boy dances the next question will be about his sexuality.

By: ninaamir

ninaamir — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 21:34:36 +0000

It seems that boys, in general, and artistic ones, in particular, are inclined to this type of behavior. That doesn’t mean they can’t learn to be organized, driven and responsible. I’m hoping Julian will. And some respond better to consequences and others to rewards. We’ve tried both. Good luck!

By: MasterPuppeteer

MasterPuppeteer — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 12:50:17 +0000

Hi Nina, been reading your blog for awhile now and glad to have found it. I have a budding premier danseur, 7-years old, who has just discovered ballet. Right now he’s only going once a week but that might/will probably change next year. We’ll see.

In the meantime, I totally sympathize with your situation with Julian. My own kid (I call him Science Boy) shows signs of heading down the same path. Smart, social, fun-loving, lots of friends, he already resists doing homework or doing anything above and beyond what is called for in his assignments. His teacher has also sent home a second note complaining about how SB chats way too much in class and has difficulty completing in-classroom work.

Part of the responsibility has to come from the teacher. I mean, c’mon, there’s only so much a parent can do. We’re outside the classroom, she’s inside. I encouraged her to be extra-tough on him.

But a bigger part of the problem truly is my slacker son who would rather be goofing off. I am at a loss as to what to do aside from giving him a stern talking-to. It’s been going on since September and he is showing no signs of improvement. We’re about to implement the “take away the DS/Wii/Computer/TV” thing starting January.

I have no words of advice for you, just a hug and an expression of support. I’m looking forward to hearing what you guys are doing, how you’re working this out with Julian. Good luck!